Sorry I’m Late I Saw a Dog Women’s Classic One-Piece Swimsuit (AOP)
$25.67
Sun’s out, buns out—but make it fashionably sarcastic. This classic one-piece swimsuit screams, “Yes, I swim… occasionally, when there’s a floatie and a cocktail involved.” Designed for the bold, the brave, and the brunch-after-pool crowd, it hugs in all the right places and judges you in none. Chlorine-resistant, sass-approved, and slightly clingy—just like your favorite ex.
Categories : Swimwear, Women’s Clothing
Tag : chlorine-resistant sarcasm, classic sass swimsuit, dog distraction couture, sunburn chic, unapologetic poolwear
Make a splash, make a statement, and maybe even make a lifeguard spit out their whistle. This one-piece isn’t just a swimsuit—it’s a lifestyle choice for the wildly fashionable and the “oops-I-saw-a-dog-again” crowd. With a classic cut, vivid prints, and elastic support for your sass and splash, you’ll turn heads faster than a beachgoer hearing someone yell, “Puppy!”
Just a heads up: it runs smaller than your confidence on Monday morning, so size up and strut on.
✨ Key Features:
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U-shaped neckline (front & back): Business in the front, pool party in the back.
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Elastic strap support: Holds the girls like it’s got tenure.
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Vibrant, chlorine-resistant prints: Doesn’t fade, even when your tan does.
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85% Polyester, 15% Spandex: For that stretch that screams “freedom and fierce.”
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Runs smaller than your last online dating match’s commitment level.
🧼 Care Instructions:
Handle with love and a bit of sass:
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Machine wash warm (max 40C or 105F)
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Dry flat like your humor
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Do not bleach (even if your ex deserves it)
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Iron on low heat if you’re fancy
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No dry cleaning—it’s a swimsuit, not a tuxedo
👙 Size Guide:
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XS – Extra Sassy: For those who confidently borrow from the toddler section and call it “petite.”
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S – Slightly Snug: Made for the dainty daydreamers with minimalist curves and maximum attitude.
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M – Marvelously Medium: The Goldilocks of fits—not too tight, not too loose, just right for brunching and beaching.
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L – Lovely & Lush: A comfortable hug for curves that don’t quit and confidence that doesn’t ask permission.
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XL – Extra Legendary: For queens who serve lewks, sass, and sunscreen—often all at once.
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2XL+ – Bold & Unapologetically Built: Designed to celebrate every curve with stretch, style, and a side of fierce.
💡 Pro Tip: Want your design to actually stay visible and not flirt with see-through awkwardness? Go for a full-bleed print. The more coverage, the fewer “oh no” moments at the pool.
#DrenchedInSarcasm #PoolsideDramaQueen #SassyAndSplashy #SwimwearForShowoffs #SorryIMissedThePoolIGotDistractedByADog
XS S M L XL 2XL 3XL Width at armpits, in 13.39 14.17 14.96 15.75 16.54 17.32 18.11 Waist width, in 11.81 12.60 13.39 14.17 14.96 15.75 16.54 Hip width, in 14.17 14.96 15.75 16.54 17.32 18.11 18.90 Side length, in 10.24 10.63 11.02 11.42 11.81 12.20 12.60 Length across front, in 21.26 21.65 22.05 22.44 22.83 23.23 23.62 -